Desi jokes

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laughingAn interview: joke

Santa Singh was waiting for the interview for a job in tourism department in Washington DC. He was the second candidate as the first one was already inside since last 10 minutes. The first candidate came out and told to all the candidates “this job is already fixed and you all are unnecessary wasting your time”. Meanwhile Santa was called for the interview and the session started….

Interviewer- “where is the statue of Liberty?”

Santa- “it is in Washington DC” (knowingly said the wrong answer).

Interviewer- “you have applied for the job in tourism department and you do not know the simple answer, so in tourism department how will you work?”

Santa- “will you give this job if a say it is in New York?”

 

An email in Hinglish: joke

Santa Singh from Amritsar Punjab was residing in Washington since childhood for last 25 years. He did not know Hindi. Once he tried to write an email to his father with mixed Hindi words to influence him. Winter was approaching and his friend Banta was going to India next week. Santa started writing an email to his father as he was requiring one blanket for the approaching winter. Santa asked his room partner about the Hindi meaning of blanket. His partner fooled Santa and told the Hindi of blanket as ‘Patni’ (Patni is the Hindi meaning of wife). Now you can see the email in Hinglish sent by Santa to his father.

“Dear dad,

I am well here. The winter has started here and I am having only one Patni with me which is not sufficient for the cold. I need one more Patni. Till now I was managing with the Patni of my friend, but yesterday he took back his Patni from me. My friend Banta is going to Amritsar next week, so kindly send one hot Patni for me. If you can not manage then send the Patni of my elder brother. In case if my brother can not spare his Patni for me then you can send your Patni which I will return back after coming to India.   

Thanks

Your loving son

Santa Singh”

 

Got rid off stupid wife: humor

There was a priest in Allahabad. He was suffering from the hardship of his wife. Whatever the priest say, his wife always decide the opposite. When priest say to his wife to make some sweet dish, she prepared the spicy food. In each and every point of view she was totally speaking and acting in opposite directions. The priest could live with her for 20 years. One day he planned to get rid off her. He said to his wife…

Priest- “people are going tomorrow for participating in Kumbh for taking bath in Ganga River at Sangam.  But I am not feeling well to go for the bath. We will go next year”

Wife- “you are not going to die. We shall go tomorrow only”

The next day both went to take bath in river.

Priest- “please don’t go in the deep water”

Wife- “you remain here at the bank. I will certainly go in the middle of the river”

The river was deep in the middle and his wife did not know the swimming. So she drowned in the river.

 

Salute tragedy: joke

On the forward post of Army base, one Subedar of Indian Army, fallen into a deep well. People saw him and started rescue operation. The brave jawans (soldiers) brought the rope and threw in the well. Subedar could catch the rope. Jawans started pulling the rope. When Subedar came on the top, jawans saw it was the Subedar so all of them saluted leaving the rope. Subedar again fallen in the well.

Officers were supervising the rescue operation. They told all the jawans to get at the side and they decided to pull the rope. All the officers joined together and started pulling the rope. When Subedar reached on the top, he saw his commanders are pulling the rope. By seeing the officers the Subedar gave salute to his commanders, so the rope from his hand slipped and he again fallen down. Lastly one crane was brought and Subedar was pulled out from the well.

 

Deciding distance: joke

Santa and Banta were living in Canada. One day they were fighting each other to decide the distance…

Santa-  “Which is near by, the Moon or Washington?”

Banta- “of course it is Moon. Because we can see the Moon from here but not Washington”

Santa- “you are wrong”

Banta- “I am right, you can verify from a third person also”

One tourist was passing there. Santa asked the same question from the tourist…

Santa-   “Which is near by, the Moon or Washington?”

Tourist replied- “Do not ask this stupid question, I am from Russia. I don’t know, I am new here.

 

 

 

1 Comment…

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  1. Naveen sgt vadodara July 1, 2013 at 8:51 pm

    A PRO [Public Relation Officer] Banta Singh was known by every one in the world
    Because of this quality his boss Santa hates Banta.

    Santa offered the post of boss if Banta will be recognized by below mentioned 2 dignitaries
    1 President of USA
    2 The Pope

    Banta accepted and both of them reached at white house main gate and there security refused to let them even see the president. Banta requested the guards that let they inform the president that Banta is at the gate. the same was done by the guards within 2 minutes president was at the gate to see and hug Banta. Seeing ths Santa got his first shock.

    Later from Vetican City 2 people were removed to accommodate Santa and Banta.
    As both of them reached there they came to know that Pope address a mass in an hour. Security was tight so Banta requested Santa to stay in the mass as and when Pope will come to address the mass Banta will be standing and talking with Pope. Santa agreed and laughed .

    After 1 hour Banta and Pope were standing and talking at the Dias .
    A sound came from the crowd – ” some got heart attack” and he was Santa .
    In the hospital Banta asked Santa why it happened?
    Santa replied- “I was OK ! when I found both You and Pope standing and talking each other. But when a man asked me by pointing a finger at you that Sir will u please tell me that who is that old man standing with Banta ? I got that attack.”

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